Since the earth evolved, every living being is striving for food. The time after the evolution of humans and apparently science, the concept of biological balance was evolved, which stated the difference between carnivorous and herbivorous animals. Herbivorous eat herbs and carnivorous eat the poor herbivores, to maintain the so called biological cycle. So, its this hunger, which all the living beings have, forces us to do kill and eat meat, fish and other food.
I am glad, that we've not actually started eating the crispy currency notes instead of food. They would be categorised as 'moneyvorous'. Just imagine how the diet of the rich and poor would be. The rich would eat only, 500 or 1000 Rupees notes and the poor would extend their living on coins. The middle class would chew the fivers, tens, fifties and hundreds. India would have more to eat than the US or UK due to the currency difference. Foreigners would come to india just to convert their dollars or pounds into more money and satisfy their hunger.
Recently, man has evolved into 'junkivorous', which is a new phenomenal evolvement of humans. This was discovered when people were striving for money and comforts, than just food. The evolvement of 'junkivorous' mammals can be stated when the human race discovered delicious pizzas and burgers. Increment of cheese and deep fried food in these made the evolution much easier.
These junkivores have a different physique than the normal humans. They are in a perfect, round shape. They're also called as obese people. Their aim is to consume as much fat foods as they can and store the energy in their body, in spite of the physical concerns which arise during the course of evolution. The reason for this is to use this energy when we finish with all the natural resources mother earth has given us.
Just imagine the yellow fat inside the obese people, would be excreted from their body to be used as fuel in our cars. The more bulkier the person, the more value he'd have. The loose fat, of some, would be converted into engine oil, healthy fat into cooking oil. And fat would also be converted into electricity.
These people have work as their primary concern than food, so just for the sake of "पापी पेट" they eat junk to make themselves feel full and satisfied. At the later stages of evolution, it becomes hard for the person to walk, climb or even work his routine. This is the stage when the fat extent is the highest, the person would be ready for fat-into-energy conversion.
"पापी पेट" is also the main reason for all the diseases as stated in Aayurveda. What we feel and look like is the result of what we eat. So, junkivores are round in shape, which is the same as a round pizza and a bulkily breaded burger.
These junkivores, would further in the future, sacrifice their partners as their shape would disrupt their partner's public image. And, some sad fat junkivores would eat more when depressed. So that would add more kilos in their already-extra weight. In some thousand years, maybe all the organs and even bones would be just fats! Everything would be fat and people would look like heavy air balloons.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
A wordy caricature
It was a fine sunny morning, when me and one of my friend planned to establish a design studio. We went to apply for the registration certificate. Here we met this hilarious personality. Some people struck a chord in your lives and you don't forget them for life. This person didn't struck any chord but did cut our pockets full of enthusiasm and money. To start with such an experience, on an auspicious occasion, made us like a 50 year old, half-bald with a huge belly and ass, saying, 'bhai humne duniya dekhi hai' with a dirty look and fake pride. This experience was as hideous as the character I am about to explain.
Age, mid 30s; sex, male; Complexion, dark. This sounds more like a 'someone missing' advertisement. I used to see these on Doordarshan every Saturday in the evening, while awaiting for the Marathi cinema at 4.00 pm. So, to proceed, his profession: he's an agent for helping to get the shop act license for starting a business without much pain in the ass. He's highly responsible for the development of our country, by helping people start their businesses without much hassle.
He runs it as his family business. I encountered it when I saw his mother handling all the cash, sitting under a luxurious umbrella on the footpath outside the license office. He is also pretty professional in his job profile, to explain: he had an ochre suitcase with papers of all his clients neatly piled up, supposedly, alphabetically.
Describing his looks, clothing and lifestyle, he was a dirty money eating caterpillar, striving on the cash of innocent leaves like us. He was half bald and on his upper head, there were some hair approximately 2 cm distant from each other. The sides of his head were abundant with hair. Half of his hectic work life went outside the registration office, in the sun, and a part of it under the table of the officers inside the registration office. Due to this and the other personal tensions, his upper head was scarcely haired. In those remaining hair, the soaring heat created tiny droplets of sweat, forming a glossy texture.
He was a proud customer of 'Manikchand gutkha'. His teeth had a complete red colour, not even pink(the mixture of white, his teeth and the red of 'gutkha') carrying the brand identity and unique style of the 'gutkha' product. His office surroundings were all drenched in those lively red squashes, which poured from his mouth like a fully flowing tap.
He was a silent and patient person and would not speak unless needed. But, as he used to open his mouth to ask for more documents, his glittery red teeth and the lovely smell of 'gutkha' used to make our eyes red. Thanks for those who invented handkerchiefs, or else we wouldn't have survived chatting with him.
His voice was comparable to the double lowest note of C, on a keyboard(piano), if existed. We could feel the vibrations of the sound his vocal cords made. It would have been a science lesson to study how sound vibrations work, if we were science students. Hearing his tone, I always felt itchy in my throat. I felt like pouring a litre of the liquid 'Vicks' forcefully in his mouth and end the dryness of his voice for ever.
His posture and dressing style was pretty formal. Clothes used to be neat and ironed. In those 5-6 time we met him during our work, he wore the same pant and maybe 2-3 different shirts. He was always wet with sweat. If his sweat was stored and desalinated, it would at-least quench the thirst of an entire lane.
He had a mobile phone, which, I suppose, had a facility to answer only if a person is trying for the third time. Whenever I called him for asking the progress of our work, he had a long pause before answering, as if he's giving a speech like our Respectable Former Prime Minister Vajpayeeji. If I repeated the question, he would go impatient and blurb out the answer, like squashing the red 'gutkha' out of his mouth.
One of his legs had a ligament problem, I suppose, as he didn't walk normally. That might be a result of slipping off the red pond of saliva surrounding his office space.
His mother was 10 times fat than him. I suspect, she ate food and he ate 'manikchand gutkha'. 2 packets for breakfast, 4 for lunch and 3 for dinner, with a glass of water.
This, Mr. Agent is unforgettable in my memories because of his slummy character, poor attitude, corrupt mind, and greedy approach. But is he the one responsible for it? Or is it the situation he faced and saw his entire life made him like this? That's a hard question to answer!
Age, mid 30s; sex, male; Complexion, dark. This sounds more like a 'someone missing' advertisement. I used to see these on Doordarshan every Saturday in the evening, while awaiting for the Marathi cinema at 4.00 pm. So, to proceed, his profession: he's an agent for helping to get the shop act license for starting a business without much pain in the ass. He's highly responsible for the development of our country, by helping people start their businesses without much hassle.
He runs it as his family business. I encountered it when I saw his mother handling all the cash, sitting under a luxurious umbrella on the footpath outside the license office. He is also pretty professional in his job profile, to explain: he had an ochre suitcase with papers of all his clients neatly piled up, supposedly, alphabetically.
Describing his looks, clothing and lifestyle, he was a dirty money eating caterpillar, striving on the cash of innocent leaves like us. He was half bald and on his upper head, there were some hair approximately 2 cm distant from each other. The sides of his head were abundant with hair. Half of his hectic work life went outside the registration office, in the sun, and a part of it under the table of the officers inside the registration office. Due to this and the other personal tensions, his upper head was scarcely haired. In those remaining hair, the soaring heat created tiny droplets of sweat, forming a glossy texture.
He was a proud customer of 'Manikchand gutkha'. His teeth had a complete red colour, not even pink(the mixture of white, his teeth and the red of 'gutkha') carrying the brand identity and unique style of the 'gutkha' product. His office surroundings were all drenched in those lively red squashes, which poured from his mouth like a fully flowing tap.
He was a silent and patient person and would not speak unless needed. But, as he used to open his mouth to ask for more documents, his glittery red teeth and the lovely smell of 'gutkha' used to make our eyes red. Thanks for those who invented handkerchiefs, or else we wouldn't have survived chatting with him.
His voice was comparable to the double lowest note of C, on a keyboard(piano), if existed. We could feel the vibrations of the sound his vocal cords made. It would have been a science lesson to study how sound vibrations work, if we were science students. Hearing his tone, I always felt itchy in my throat. I felt like pouring a litre of the liquid 'Vicks' forcefully in his mouth and end the dryness of his voice for ever.
His posture and dressing style was pretty formal. Clothes used to be neat and ironed. In those 5-6 time we met him during our work, he wore the same pant and maybe 2-3 different shirts. He was always wet with sweat. If his sweat was stored and desalinated, it would at-least quench the thirst of an entire lane.
He had a mobile phone, which, I suppose, had a facility to answer only if a person is trying for the third time. Whenever I called him for asking the progress of our work, he had a long pause before answering, as if he's giving a speech like our Respectable Former Prime Minister Vajpayeeji. If I repeated the question, he would go impatient and blurb out the answer, like squashing the red 'gutkha' out of his mouth.
One of his legs had a ligament problem, I suppose, as he didn't walk normally. That might be a result of slipping off the red pond of saliva surrounding his office space.
His mother was 10 times fat than him. I suspect, she ate food and he ate 'manikchand gutkha'. 2 packets for breakfast, 4 for lunch and 3 for dinner, with a glass of water.
This, Mr. Agent is unforgettable in my memories because of his slummy character, poor attitude, corrupt mind, and greedy approach. But is he the one responsible for it? Or is it the situation he faced and saw his entire life made him like this? That's a hard question to answer!
Monday, July 6, 2009
Summing practicality in fiction
Recently, I was watching a documentary on BBC, "triumph and tragedy" which was based on the NASA experiments. It showed all the achievements and failures of NASA, from landing on the moon to orbiting the earth in a space shuttle.
It focussed on the challenges and efforts of making a space shuttle, which can be reused to save millions of dollars. The process of getting out of the earth's orbit needs tonnes of fuel and re-entering suffers tonnes of heat. So tiling the space shuttle with heat resistant tiles was essential. The last tragedy in 2004 when, the crew on board the space shuttle, including the legendary Indian woman, Kalpana Chawla, in NASA's reusable space shuttle fell prey to the excessive heat which entered the space shuttle through a broken tile and destroyed it, including the crew, into hundreds of pieces. That was a big tragedy.
While watching the documentary, an abrupt thought struck my mind. What if superman was in real! Now you would think that I'd say that for saving the space shuttle. NO! I thought, he was resistant to almost everything, including fire, but his clothes? I suspect: no! We have seen him going out and entering the earth's orbit a thousand times, in the repeat telecasts of his movies on HBO. So, my point of concern is, if he was real, then he would require new clothes every time he entered the earth's atmosphere, as those would turn into ashes in the 1500 Degrees of soaring heat. He's resistant even to sun, so even his pubic hair would remain cool as the Himalayan ice, but his clothes? This is the question!
What if, Iron man was here working on the development of his latest suit? NASA wouldn't be there, because, Mr. Tony Stark would reach even the sun, with his astonishing, high speed, one manned, universal shuttle. Though, he would certainly need a space caravan behind him to rest and store his food and supplies.
Ok, lets forget about the western super heroes, and think about our own, "Shaktimaan." Though, he's a colour Xerox copy of Superman, with some spicy addition of ancient, Indian spirituality lessons, like attaining 'siddhis' with meditation, and enduring the supernatural powers, and a spin travel, rather than going in a normal and straight way. He would've obviously fainted a hundred times if he was in real. He has orbited the earth for a thousand times, almost in all his episodes. In his case of re-entering the earth's atmosphere, he would also need a couple of thousand costumes, to start his work without any delay, and a towel to hide his sensory organs immediately after he reaches the earth's atmosphere.
To make the lives of these super heroes simple, I would've suggested them to tile their clothes, with those resistant tiles used in the space shuttle by NASA, or make a towel out of them, to hide in till they dress up with their original costumes after getting home.
It focussed on the challenges and efforts of making a space shuttle, which can be reused to save millions of dollars. The process of getting out of the earth's orbit needs tonnes of fuel and re-entering suffers tonnes of heat. So tiling the space shuttle with heat resistant tiles was essential. The last tragedy in 2004 when, the crew on board the space shuttle, including the legendary Indian woman, Kalpana Chawla, in NASA's reusable space shuttle fell prey to the excessive heat which entered the space shuttle through a broken tile and destroyed it, including the crew, into hundreds of pieces. That was a big tragedy.
While watching the documentary, an abrupt thought struck my mind. What if superman was in real! Now you would think that I'd say that for saving the space shuttle. NO! I thought, he was resistant to almost everything, including fire, but his clothes? I suspect: no! We have seen him going out and entering the earth's orbit a thousand times, in the repeat telecasts of his movies on HBO. So, my point of concern is, if he was real, then he would require new clothes every time he entered the earth's atmosphere, as those would turn into ashes in the 1500 Degrees of soaring heat. He's resistant even to sun, so even his pubic hair would remain cool as the Himalayan ice, but his clothes? This is the question!
What if, Iron man was here working on the development of his latest suit? NASA wouldn't be there, because, Mr. Tony Stark would reach even the sun, with his astonishing, high speed, one manned, universal shuttle. Though, he would certainly need a space caravan behind him to rest and store his food and supplies.
Ok, lets forget about the western super heroes, and think about our own, "Shaktimaan." Though, he's a colour Xerox copy of Superman, with some spicy addition of ancient, Indian spirituality lessons, like attaining 'siddhis' with meditation, and enduring the supernatural powers, and a spin travel, rather than going in a normal and straight way. He would've obviously fainted a hundred times if he was in real. He has orbited the earth for a thousand times, almost in all his episodes. In his case of re-entering the earth's atmosphere, he would also need a couple of thousand costumes, to start his work without any delay, and a towel to hide his sensory organs immediately after he reaches the earth's atmosphere.
To make the lives of these super heroes simple, I would've suggested them to tile their clothes, with those resistant tiles used in the space shuttle by NASA, or make a towel out of them, to hide in till they dress up with their original costumes after getting home.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
SOS/help/F1
Help! All the wise humans are preaching since ages, that we must help each other in good deeds, but the scenario is not the same today. I tried to do some research in this area and plotted down some of my findings. Use of heavy academic lingo like, research and all makes the crap sound evidential.
These days, we have help any where anytime! Life has become so easy. In the US we have 911, in the UK we have 999 and in India we have two or three lines, distributed in their own specialities, as far as I know, the 100 is the police, 101 is for fire brigade and ambulance, I guess. The ones who have experienced a trauma might have by-hearted these numbers. There are companies providing help for a car breakdown, if it does, in an area synonymous to the Sahara dessert or the Antarctic region. We find help in softwares, which is the F1 key. I've also encountered some senseless comics like a drowning person shouting F1 from the sea. Then I've seen some of the NGO's stating SOS planet earth, save trees, save water. Some also feel that drinking beer would be an option of saving water. So everything, everyone needs help and help is everywhere!
Sometimes, can create problems in relationships. Although, help helps in making up relationships, but it also makes them complex. To make it simple I tried to sophisticate it in two formulae, the first one is: Girl + Help = Boy + Infatuation. In this formula, if a girl tries to help a boy, the boy takes it as her interest in him and he gets infatuated with her. This creates a misunderstanding, sometimes ending in a red mark on the guy's face or some earth on his cheeks.
The other formula is exactly opposite of the first one! It goes: Boy + Help = Girl + Suspicion. Elaborating it defines that: if a boy tries to help a girl, the girl can assume that he's interested in her and she tries to ignore him, which can puzzle the guy.
Help can also make up relations. This can be explained like, if a guy helps an old woman cross a busy street, or save a puppy, wandering on a busy highway, in front of his girlfriend, she can get impressed! I had tried to impress my ex. by evacuating a puppy from the middle of a highway, but it ended in impressing the mother of that puppy who chased me for a mile. I luckily escaped 14 injections, possibly some in my belly.
So help has advantages and disadvantages as we saw. We help agents outside any of the government offices to do our work, in that we help save our time. By saving our time we work more at office which helps our job, which helps ours as well as that agent's family. This helps in getting those government officers more corrupted, and eventually it helps in the contribution of the underdevelopment of our nation. So again, help is everywhere, may it be negative.
So folks, help and get help, but only for good deeds!
These days, we have help any where anytime! Life has become so easy. In the US we have 911, in the UK we have 999 and in India we have two or three lines, distributed in their own specialities, as far as I know, the 100 is the police, 101 is for fire brigade and ambulance, I guess. The ones who have experienced a trauma might have by-hearted these numbers. There are companies providing help for a car breakdown, if it does, in an area synonymous to the Sahara dessert or the Antarctic region. We find help in softwares, which is the F1 key. I've also encountered some senseless comics like a drowning person shouting F1 from the sea. Then I've seen some of the NGO's stating SOS planet earth, save trees, save water. Some also feel that drinking beer would be an option of saving water. So everything, everyone needs help and help is everywhere!
Sometimes, can create problems in relationships. Although, help helps in making up relationships, but it also makes them complex. To make it simple I tried to sophisticate it in two formulae, the first one is: Girl + Help = Boy + Infatuation. In this formula, if a girl tries to help a boy, the boy takes it as her interest in him and he gets infatuated with her. This creates a misunderstanding, sometimes ending in a red mark on the guy's face or some earth on his cheeks.
The other formula is exactly opposite of the first one! It goes: Boy + Help = Girl + Suspicion. Elaborating it defines that: if a boy tries to help a girl, the girl can assume that he's interested in her and she tries to ignore him, which can puzzle the guy.
Help can also make up relations. This can be explained like, if a guy helps an old woman cross a busy street, or save a puppy, wandering on a busy highway, in front of his girlfriend, she can get impressed! I had tried to impress my ex. by evacuating a puppy from the middle of a highway, but it ended in impressing the mother of that puppy who chased me for a mile. I luckily escaped 14 injections, possibly some in my belly.
So help has advantages and disadvantages as we saw. We help agents outside any of the government offices to do our work, in that we help save our time. By saving our time we work more at office which helps our job, which helps ours as well as that agent's family. This helps in getting those government officers more corrupted, and eventually it helps in the contribution of the underdevelopment of our nation. So again, help is everywhere, may it be negative.
So folks, help and get help, but only for good deeds!
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