Feminization...

Don't get mesmerised by the title, I am neither deploying female hormones in anyone, nor is it an experiment, or some scientific hypocrisy! It's my experience about women in general, some weird, some loveable.

One thing, which might have been proven, women are born to talk, gossip and murmur. Most of these siddhis, of understanding women, were gained by me while I was in a serious relationship with my ex for an honourable 3.5 years. I was sentenced in a relationship on 29th February 2005. Because it was a leap year, with the help of my lawyers, my friends, and the judge, my girlfriend, the date was shifted to 1st of March 2005 and I was given the statement at 6.15pm at Balgandharva Rang Mandir(BRM), Pune. I know, you were expecting some romantic place, but unfortunately it was BRM. I was sentenced to indefinite relationship, until the possibility of marriage, when I said those three lovely words. I wish those were "Mera Bharat Mahan".

The years weren't as bad as I made them sound. They had quarrels and fights, love and caressing, jokes and laughter, ethics and manners as well. Talking about ethics, I remember that girls are very particular about how their boyfriend present's himself in public. I was always poked or pinched while, eating without worldly concerns, driving too fast or too slow, talking nonsense to anyone in front of her, doing nothing, having dressed too dull or too glittery. I still remember a big quarrel of ours on my eating habits, which resulted in 3 days of mental agony. We were eating "paani puri" together, and she ordered a last dish for herself, through me, which never went to her. I gulped the entire dish, in my own dreams, not realising the world, as if I've been starving for a decade. Then I realised the quantity of my mistake and the quality of quarrel to come.

A lot of girls I've befriended possess extreme characteristics. A couple of them are career oriented, bold and stern in their decisions, which usually are hard to impress. One of my friend is comfortable in not crossing her comfort zone. One job for life time, no intention of change or shift, same road to office, same vehicle, same people around, same daily routine for years. How is it possible for one to be so sternly dumb, highly boring, working in a creative environment? (being a classmate, she was a graphic designer too). I am attracted to girls who are bold, decisive and career oriented. My ex was the same, hence I felt for her. I have another friend of mine, who's bold, decisive and, instead of career, she's boyfriend oriented. She likes to change boys like, disposable nappies.

I used to be a flirt in my college days, playing pranks with my girl friends. Some girls knew it was just a prank but sometimes it used to get serious. A few girls revealed their feelings for me, a few didn't talk after that, and a few were on the verge of slapping me, until I told them that it was just a prank. Neither was I a hunk of the college, nor was I rich. I came to college on a grey coloured Bajaj's scooter, of my dad. So, only if it was a time in 70s I would have been a hip, girls running behind my scooter. Many of my girl friends never liked sitting on pillion's end. They reasoned it as being uncomfortable, but I knew, they'd certainly occupy the seat if it was a lavish motorbike. So, the verse, "girls like cash and bikes more than the person" is absolutely true. The ones who'd deny this might be in true love or something. Later on I bought a new motorbike, and each of my girl friends wanted a ride on it. Although I felt revengeful, I fulfilled theirs wishes. For one, most memorable event in my relationship, I still respect my ex. That was, while buying a new bike, I faked her that I'd be buying an ordinary bike, showing budgetary concerns. She had a simple answer and she said it without a single thought, that, I was more important to her than any materialistic thing.

A few things I've understood about women are: They expect a lot from guys. They never let out their expectations, and we have to understand those. They want a guy to be understanding, caring, supportive and entertaining at times. Most girls, like aggressive guys, even if the guy resembles a blade of grass. "Girls like shopping", is not true with me as I haven't had a deadly experience of it, even my ex wasn't shopping savvy. And, last but not the least thing I'd say is important dates. Guys who tend to forget these dates are vulnerable to a heart break.